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9 minute read

We are the menopause mavericks! Some have been shouting loudly for years, asking the media to get interested in life-changing information about midlife bodies, hearts, and minds. Some have been quietly seeking help. Too many have felt abandoned, confused, and helpless.

Unless you have been under a rock for the month of May 2021 (and let’s face it, sometimes in perimenopause being under a rock is really nice!), you know that finally, the media is giving us a voice. Don’t underestimate the contribution you are making to history, as part of the generation that changed the way menopause is acknowledged, cared for and respected. You are plan A!

Now we need to get to plan B. How to move through the rocky days of perimenopause, and how to stay well, strong, empowered, and comfortable after menopause, and for the rest of our lives.

In May 2021 the Irish airwaves were filled with the stories of women’s menopause struggle. Two things were clear: it can be really rough, and there is a huge gap in knowledge in the medical community which is most women’s port of call. A week later there was a documentary given over to Menopause. It addressed the struggles of menopause and possible increased health risks. And it offered one ‘possible’ answer: HRT.

Can I clear up a few things, please? Menopause can increase bone density loss, heart health issues and diabetes risk. There is ongoing research that suggests it MAY increase your risk of Alzheimer’s. There is other research that points elsewhere. Further, the research into using HRT to prevent Alzheimer’s is in its infancy. It is far from conclusive. Risks for everything increases with age! I’m not trying to be grim. Age and death are non-negotiable parts of living.

PLAN HRT

Why am I calling for plan B, and not just plan HRT? Well, plan HRT gets all the coverage because we trust our doctors and because we all (including me) want a pill to make it all go away. But what if I was to quote a song: “the drugs don’t work, they just make it worse” would you say I was wrong? Well, yes, I would be wrong; the drugs can be awesome. Many women find equilibrium again by using HRT. They sleep again, find energy, their joints don’t ache, they feel less anxious, they are released from depression, they can drink alcohol again without a 6-day hangover!

Seriously, with suicide rates among women in Ireland and the UK peaking between the ages of 45-54, I think HRT has saved lives. But, the drugs do not work for everyone, not by a long shot, so we still need plan B, because millions of women find HRT unsuitable. There are a variety of medical reasons why the risks from taking it are higher than for some women so it is not prescribed to them. And for many others no amount of tweaking of doses and combinations make the benefits outweigh the sometimes hefty side-effects. And for others, it’s just not the choice they want to make.

Even if you are on HRT that’s working well, you still need plan B because HRT is not a magic bullet. Your body is still ageing, and that brings certain changes and risks and can bring us to a mental or emotional crisis that also needs care.

There are communities around the world that have fewer menopause symptoms and really low rates of osteoporosis. What unites these communities is a life that is less engaged in the hamster wheel of endless productivity and consumerism, and where age is not a crime!

In fact, in these communities, age is revered, and women are considered wise elders after menopause. What does that kind of life, and that inclusion and respect do? It reduces stress. Stress is the number 1 bully in the playground of the perimenopausal woman.

So, when I’m done getting everyone engaged in plan B, I’ll be introducing them to plan C: Community respect and support, leading to increased confidence and visibility in women, so that we no longer feel valueless and we don’t reject ourselves. HRT will not do this. For a while, it might make us feel more confident as we look and feel younger (the holy grail!), but as the years go by, we will meet the stigma attached to female ageing that is so different to that of men. Menopause is a social and emotional journey that needs plan C too.

so What is Plan B?

It’s Beans, Bands and Booty! This is the plan that, once you start to implement it, will show your body that the things that worked when you had periods for staying healthy, balanced, confident, strong and enjoying life still work, no matter what your life phase. The life you lead matters before and after menopause. Only much more so after…

What follows are supports that are proven to aid in protecting us in terms of heart health, brain health, bone health, muscle mass, diabetes, inflammation and more.

Beans

Why Beans? We need to eat really well. Perimenopause and beyond are phases where our bodies need more nourishment than before. Think whole foods, think variety, think protein, think good fats, think lots of minerals, think fibre. Ok. Not only beans, but as it happens, they have a lot of those things. (Disclaimers: 1) there are no magic foods, 2) beans need to be cooked really well.)

But there’s more to beans than eating! Achievable ways of maintaining bone density and muscle mass (the two go hand in hand) are so important. What are you more likely to do: go to the gym religiously three times a week for the rest of your life, or do a few arm strengthening reps, or lunges in the kitchen with a couple of tins of beans in your hands every now and then?

I teach Yoga for the Stages of Menopause, and train other teachers in this growing resource. We add weights and resistance Bands to normal Yoga to increase muscular demand. These engaged muscles call on their bones to step up and strengthen. Our bones need specific demand, so running or hiking helps with thigh and hip bones, but it won’t help your spine for instance.

What to do

Feeling you have to do it all will increase stress, and so, actually, can exercise. So, here are some tips…

Make your changes achievable: learn some short routines you can do at home, after a gentle run, or at your desk. (By the way, learning new physical things helps with cognition and memory, like dance steps, or yoga moves, or just brushing your teeth with the opposite hand.)
Rest after stress (whether that’s a run, a strong Yoga session, or an argument). Rest is your best friend now.
Learn use-anywhere techniques to calm stress and anxiety.
Make dietary changes that aren’t drastic and unsustainable.

Bands & Booty

Back to plan B! Resistance bands, but also, your favourite band. Play a song and shake your booty! Why? Well… we can feel a little less joy in midlife, and we get a little less moist in all our tissues: around our joints, our fascia (the fabric that makes us slinky, which, when sedentary and dry can make us feel a bit all-over creaky), our vulvas and vaginas. All these are tissues that LOVE to move. Flowing movement like you get in somatic-style, or Yinstinct Yoga, or when you dance is essential for your body’s mobility and health. So is most exercise. But exercise versus moving with pleasure is like the difference between a sunbed and a tropical holiday (not advocating sunbeds here by the way).

The Pleasure principle

The difference is pleasure. We can’t control the journey of our reproductive hormones, but we can increase pleasure, to great hormonal effect. Perimenopause has negative effects on other hormones like cortisol (the stress hormone), insulin, and feel-good hormones. But we do have some power over them. We can reduce cortisol by reducing stress (loads of techniques in Yoga for Menopause), we can manage our insulin better by avoiding quick-release sugars: think whole grains, adding protein and good fats to snacks, avoiding alcohol (sorry!) and we can increase the feel-good hormones.

Many of us feel a lack of pleasure during this transition. But if you can change your perspective to thinking, how can I give back to this body that has minded me for all these years, you might learn to embrace pleasure again. If that’s a difficult concept for you –perhaps you feel unsexual and that’s what you think pleasure is, or you only associate pleasure with chocolate, wine and sofas - be aware that pleasure is available in many ways: think pleasurable movement, meditation, massage, hugs (even a pillow), exposure to daylight, social interaction, exercise you enjoy.

The feel-good hormones are essentially medicinal: they have many of the properties of oestrogen and progesterone: better sleep, less inflammation, regulation of appetite, positive feelings, memory improvement, less anxiety, reduced experience of pain, and more access to feeling pleasure.

plan b in a nutshell

Beans: Increase nutrition a lot, in ways you enjoy.
Bands: Increase movement you enjoy, and make achievable demands on your bones.
Booty: Increase pleasure, reduce stress, and rest… all the time!

And please, let yourself be who you are becoming, so you don’t spend the rest of your precious life fighting with yourself. Let’s make that plan A - Acceptance of you.

Niamh Daly has been teaching yoga since 2004, and since 2016 she has been researching menopause and so developed Yinstinct Yoga for the Stages of Menopause. She coaches women in nutrition, stress relief, and exercise, and trains yoga teachers throughout the world.
Follow her here.