8 minute read

Imen McDonnell is an American living on a farm in the West of Ireland. Since leaving the bustle of busy cities such as New York, LA and Minneapolis, where she worked in TV production, to be here in the rural countryside with her Irish husband and son, her life changed direction. She was inspired to write, and her column in The Irish Farmer’s Journal, featuring recipes and stories of her life in the countryside became a book: The Farmette Cookbook: Recipes and Adventures from My Life on an Irish Farm. In 2013, she created food and photography workshops, Lens and Larder (with another woman in her heyday, Cliodhna Prendergast) and she has most recently worked on food styling for the upcoming Apple TV sci-fi series, Foundation which airs in Autumn.

Imen is one of those women from whom creativity pours forth with ease, helped, no doubt, by the beautiful environment on the West coast, but is mainly natural and innate. Her Instagram is a sight to behold, and the platform where we, and so many other women, have become friends of sorts; connecting over comments that then segue to DM’s where creative juices flow, ideas are shared, and plans are made. And as a result, today she shares her life in midlife with us…

Which three adjectives describe you best?

Intuitive. Independent. Unconventional.

What is on your mind most these days?

Our teen son’s sudden independent streak and how I can stay closer to him, yet let him spread his wings. Also, when will our family unit will be able to travel home to the USA and back to Ireland safely and with peace of mind.

What is the last thing that you said no to?

NO is a litmus test for me. I usually decide everything by asking myself “what if I say no, how will I feel?” Having said that, I cannot remember anything I have said no to in a VERY long time. Maybe I should reconsider this strategy.

What is the last thing you said yes to?

Adopting 2 rescue battery hens. (best YES ever – please consider this)

What made you decide to do what you are now doing in your life?

Someone wiser than I coined the saying, “necessity is the mother of all invention” – in a way, I started down my current career path out of a need to create and grow (both figuratively and tangibly, with regard to growing food that I wanted myself and my family to be able to enjoy which was not easily accessible here at the time) and simply thrive in a new, very rural, isolated base that I had not been accustomed to before in my life. Miraculously, 15 years later, I have sort of circuitously been able to fuse my former production career passions with what I am doing now in food - vis a vis organising visual arts workshops/gatherings/events, doing styling work for print and television along with photography and other creative assignments.

How many things have you been in your life so far?

Eeek! A LOT, as it turns out. Daughter, student, college bartender, clothing boutique sales assistant, art college receptionist, homeless shelter support worker*, graphic designer/art director, tv production intern, production assistant tv/film, wardrobe assistant tv/film, producer tv/film/commercial, farm wife, production business manager tv series, boy mother, blogger, newspaper columnist, cookbook author, food writer, food stylist and photographer, workshop & event producer, fixer-upper of a historic thatched cottage, and current birther of a new studio/food space in a beautiful old stone barn near our home farm. *this was my most fulfilling job, outside of being a mother.

Where do you come in your family, and did this have any influence on you?

Definitely influential. I came second to my late brother who was 6 years older than me. Too much to unpack there for this piece.

Are you where you wanted to be at this stage in your life?

Good question! Not sure. In some ways, I have surpassed some of my wildest dreams in terms of work accomplishments. On a personal level, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to become a mother and it’s my life’s greatest gift. Getting to work with a lot of insanely talented people and being a published author with international distribution makes me very proud. But, mostly I often feel like a restless hungry ghost wondering what the next new big assignment will be and how I can be a better person…always working on that.

What is the best, and worst piece of advice you have received in your life so far?

I’ll never forget an amazing wardrobe stylist that I worked with on a shoot in Vancouver a couple of years before I moved to Ireland. She had just recovered from brain surgery and was on set wearing the most stylish denim jumpsuit which literally had the image of her clear MRI brain scan silkscreened onto the back of it, telling me and the crew “HAVE FUN OR YOU WON'T.” That has stuck with me, and it’s definitely a good general life mantra! Worst advice: Fake it till you make it – which only works until the jig is up. Hard work and dedication is the only way to true success.

What does midlife feel like to you?

I am just entering this stage and it definitely feels transitional, both physically and emotionally. It’s a bit frightening at times to be fair. But, also with resources like HEYDAY and others spreading more awareness about this stage in life, and specifically how it affects women, I am feeling more secure in what this next chapter holds.

Is there something you have dreamt of doing for a long time? What is it?

My husband and I have been hashing out an idea for a screenplay for many years. We have outlines and drafts written and one day, ONE (HEY?) DAY, I know it will be completed. Also, a travel editor that I deeply admire has me nonstop dreaming of going to the Aeolian Islands. I’ve been to Sicily, but not to this stunning archipelago in the Tyrrhenian Sea.

Has there been a place, event, or experience that has transformed you or given you a new perspective?

This is going to sound completely bonkers, but it’s the first thing that came to mind when I read this question. I met Oprah years ago, and when we shook hands I felt a bolt of electricity go through my entire body. After that, I felt quite invincible for a very long time which I secretly attributed to this handshake. Bizarre, but true.

Of course, my experience of moving to Ireland completely transformed me in many splendid and surprising ways, not the least of which is how humbled I have become. And, then there’s motherhood…

Is there a milestone you are working towards in your personal or professional life at the moment?

Working on getting Table at Stone Arch Barn creative food space up and running – currently swimming in the vernacular of architectural layouts, planning permission submissions, grant applications and building tenders (the three latter items are far from my strong suit).

Do you feel your creativity is surging or sinking in midlife?

Surging, and I worry I won’t get everything that I want to do before it’s over. Granted, there are days where I have low energy and am overwhelmed and feel like everything is totally sinking, but I tend to focus on what can I do to be creative which is restorative.

What do you spend too much time doing? And what do you spend too little doing?

Instagram and other mindless time-stealing scrolling. I find that I spend too much time taking photos and videos of what I am doing and too little time just being in the moment and living life. Ugh.

How do you care for your own wellbeing?

I tend to put everyone and everything before my own wellbeing, so I frequently fall off the wagon of being my “best self”, but I do have a personal formula for “mothering myself” that is necessary for me to function at a high level, and I do work as hard as I can at it. It includes daily exercise (with sweat), walks in nature with our dogs, breathing in the sea air at least twice/month, staying hydrated (electrolytes), long baths with sheet masks or seaweed, limiting rich foods and/or alcohol.

Therapy; I used to have a great therapist in the states whom I’d have phone appointments even after moving here, which literally felt like mental spa appointments, but she has since retired (midlife!) so I’m looking for a new one. Physically digging my hands into the ground/gardening, good stretches/yoga/pilates, chatting and laughing with girlfriends, vitamin supplements, Insight Timer meditations, cooking with my son, dreaming up ideas with my husband, reading a good book in bed, Sunday papers and good coffee (I read the FT on a Sunday as it reminds me of my former Sunday NY Times ritual. It’s a lot – if I do 50% I feel like a million dollars.

Do you sleep well?

Not all the time. I have Bach Flower Remedy Night Rescue on my nightstand which works a treat when my brain won’t turn off at 2 am.

Do you take any supplements or HRT?

Not yet, but I am doing the research and definitely not opposed to it.

What do you love about yourself?

That I cannot take myself too seriously no matter how hard I try!

When do you feel truly alive?

At a big convivial table surrounded by family, friends, delicious food, and fabulous wine. On a production set or in a recording studio with live musicians.

What do you consider your biggest achievements?

Growing a baby inside and outside of me into a teen who is a kind, considerate and complex human. Being a published author, writer, and photographer.

What was a major turning point in your life?

Coming to Ireland.

What are you looking forward to?

Seeing family and friends stateside again. (See first answer).

Are you a good friend?

I hope so! I try to be and I never take my friends for granted.

What in life is beautiful to you? Where do you find inspiration?

This is going to sound cliché, but I do try to find beauty in everything. I decided that this was necessary during a stage in my life when I was quite depressed. I am most inspired by creative people, film, art, music, theatre, food & nature.