The Beauty of your Inner Child

I have been thinking a lot lately about kindness and how we should not only treat others kindly but ourselves too. We can be our own worst enemies, putting pressure on ourselves to be perfect and continuously do it all. Beating ourselves up and putting ourselves down when we don’t achieve goals and deadlines that are often set by none other than ourselves. And it’s time to change that narrative.

I decided as we approached Lockdown 2 that I was going to be kinder to myself and let go of some unnecessary pressures. Instead of inflicting the pressures of time on myself and the inevitable guilt that comes with a non-productive day, I would try to enjoy the present moments. This time around I was going to take it back to basics and enjoy some creature comforts. If I was still a child I’d need words of encouragement and comfort right now. How would I treat and speak to myself if I was speaking to the younger me? Not middle-aged me who has become accustomed to a stern talking–to from my own self but the inner child who hasn’t yet encountered self-awareness and the feeling of inadequacy it can bring. Playing at being a grown-up can be exhausting, and sometimes we all need a little minding.

Less Screen Time

I decided the first thing I needed was a limit on screen time like children do. So on the eve of this lockdown, I deleted my social media apps from my phone. Our natural instinct is to shield children from the scary things in this world while offering simplistic explanations on a need to know basis. It’s important we address our stressors and step away when the time is right. We all know social media is great but it can also be toxic. I’m feeling far more in tune with my own stress which feels strangely less without constant scrolling and losing myself down a wormhole watching random strangers arguing on the internet. Some of the things we loved as children still bring us joy and comfort now and I want to nurture that during this downtime. I was far more impressed by the sassiness, rebelliousness and uniqueness of the people who influenced me back in the 80s than I ever will be by the perfection we see on Instagram now. Watching Madonna dry her armpits on a hand dryer in a subway restroom in Desperately Seeking Susan was one of the coolest things I had ever seen. I intend to dance around my kitchen and listen to music as I did back then. Those glory days when you knew an album off by heart, back to front and inside out because when you listened to a tape you couldn’t skip past those songs you didn’t like as much as the others. Nothing was as fast or instant back then. If you wanted to change the channel on the TV, you had to get up from the sofa. Sometimes we had no choice but to just stop and be.

I was obsessed with Madonna. And we even had the same beauty mark above our lip. That gave me more of a kick than any amount of likes could possibly bring a child now. It was a joyful comparison, not a popularity contest. I still wear my beauty mark with pride and I even enhance it with a brown brow pencil every now and then because foundation, and indeed age, tend to fade them slightly. I’m hopeful this period of going back to basics and wearing lighter makeup will encourage more women to embrace their freckles. So many women like to hide their freckles - Irish women in particular - but that in turn just masks good skin. If some freckles are visible it creates the illusion of less makeup and I have been known to add some fake ones on a shoot to bring the skin back to life. Now is the time to experiment with makeup in so many ways. And that may mean wearing less of it but it could also be the perfect time to try a statement lip or a bold eye colour. With fewer people to meet, you now have the opportunity to become familiar and comfortable with some new techniques and styles without the pressure of worrying what others may think of you.

Eternal youth

As children, we feel a bit invincible. Age seems so far off, it feels you’ll never experience it. But if I could offer advice to my younger self I would tell her to wear more SPF. It’s never too late to start anything and although I wish I understood then that I would need a little more preserving, I’m definitely going to try to make up for any lost time now. We can leave the fairy tale of eternal youth to Peter Pan but there are definitely some products and routines that can help us look our best. I was introduced to Biologique Recherche products just before Lockdown 1 by Skincare Specialist, Natalie Larkin. Cleansing with Lait VIP 02 feels comforting and intentional. Massaging the cleanser into my skin for at least two minutes is a little ritual that feels like some me time. But getting your skincare right takes homework and Natalie recommends using cold water instead of warm. Cold water is cooling and calming while warm water can aggravate inflammation and redness. The temptation is always there to revert back to a splash of warm water to rinse the cleanser away. It’s like that gratifying feeling of thawing your feet at a fire after you’d spent hours playing in the snow. My school report on the change from warm water to cold reads the same as it did all those years ago - ‘Could try harder.’

I follow Lait VIP 02 with the amazing Lotion P50 PIGM 400. This lotion contains brightening agents and exfoliating active ingredients. It helps recover a luminous and radiant skin and is ideal for dull complexions and hyperpigmentation. This product has now become the favourite teddy bear I can’t live without.

Eating Spinach will make you big and strong

Who would have thought a pipe-smoking sailor like Popeye who religiously swallowed a can of spinach before a brawl could encourage us to eat our greens? That doesn’t sound as appealing these days but eating spinach for its skin benefits is definitely something to get on board with. Vitamins A, C and K can help hydrate, brighten and heal the skin and reduce inflammation. In addition to its skin benefits, it is also important for eye health. Spinach contains lutein and Zeaxanthin which can help prevent Age-Related Macular Degeneration and cataracts. With no reason to eat on the go, we now have the time to plan our meals and make healthier choices. Eating all your greens will make you feel far less guilty when you have the treats you need to get you through the coming weeks. And if you decide to bake a cake don’t forget how much you loved to lick the spoon!

Take a bath

I still remember the excitement of bath cubes in my Christmas stocking. My biggest dilemma in those days was deciding if I wanted to smell of Lavender or Lily of the Valley, or perhaps I’d go all out with a strawberry bubblegum bubble bath. These days my senses prefer more sophisticated and varied fragrances such as fresh, citrusy vetiver, woody oud and fig. Indulge the senses and soften the skin by adding some bath oil from Jo Malone. You can also apply this to wet skin or I enjoy mixing it with an unscented body lotion for a fragrance that lingers all day. For the ultimate at-home spa-like experience, lie back and enjoy the scent of Irish brand Voya’s African Lime and Clove scented candle.

We always speak about how kids are so resilient and we need to draw on some of that resilience now. Finding solace in the things you loved as a young girl makes life feel a little less complex. It’s a different kind of time-out to the naughty-step. It never mattered back then if you stayed inside the lines when colouring –in. In fact, you would have been praised for your efforts. And we all deserve ten out of ten for our efforts getting through this past year.