4 minute read

My style icon from last weekend’s Oscars was British actress Olivia Colman. The 48-year-old, who wore a silver pleated lamé dress with theatrical flared sleeves by Dior, personified Old Hollywood glamour, but with a distinctly modern edge. Far from the traditional bosom-boosting, hip-hugging fishtail gowns of red carpet icons such as Elizabeth Taylor and Sophia Loren, Colman’s gown left everything to the imagination, with its high neckline, floor-sweeping hemline and exaggerated sleeves. The exquisite metallic dress, with its modern sensuality, offered a different kind of drama and a more contemporary, but no less enthralling, definition of glamour, which I adored.

It’s wonderful to see so many midlife women stealing the style show during awards season. For a time, the wonderful Helen Mirren seemed to be a lone poster girl for fashionable women over the age of 45, but last weekend’s Academy Awards played host to a wonderfully diverse cast of talented women, each of whom signified through their unique personal aesthetic, that great style has no expiry date. From Maya Rudolph, Uma Thurman and Laverne Cox to Queen Latifah, Jada Pinkett Smith and Judi Dench, each of these women wowed me with their confident fashion choices. These women aren’t just older and wiser, they’re older and bolder. Some went big on colour, others opted for bold silhouettes, a few focused on directional detailing, but each went her own way, helping to build a new narrative around what women in mid and later life can and should look like.

It seems fitting then that this week also saw the launch of high street behemoth H&M’s collaboration with 100-year-old New York fashion legend Iris Apfel. A woman celebrated for her eclectic style and statement dressing, Apfel has always challenged the stereotypes surrounding what growing old looks like. For instance, she wears her short white hair in a dramatic quiff, which is more punk than pensioner, and her signature bug-eyed sunglasses are more millennial than matronly.

The terms once associated with older women’s style – classic, understated, neutral – have never been part of her visual dialogue.

I was lucky enough to be invited to preview the collection on Wednesday before its launch on Thursday and it was an absolute cacophony of colour, texture and print. I’ve always thought dressing for your personality far more important than dressing to suit your shape, and this collection was the sartorial embodiment of Apfel’s joyous and unconventional character.

Apfel approaches her wardrobe as she does her life; with gusto, and so should we midlifers. We talk a lot on Heyday about how growing older means growing bolder – our confidence, self-belief and sense of purpose strengthen – so it makes sense that what we wear reflects this mental and emotional shift. Of course, we’re not all a flamboyant Iris Apfel-type. I was gifted a pair of baroque-style bejewelled clip-on frog earrings from the collection, which though absolutely fabulous, would look ridiculous on me because my personality isn’t colourful enough to pull off such an eccentric piece. I have a friend, on the other hand, who will wear these as well as Iris herself. I would simply look like a try-hard copycat, and while imitation is the best form of flattery, it’s the worst way to approach our wardrobes.

Being fearless with our midlife style means doing so within the context of our own individual aesthetic and sense of self. I’m an introvert, but I love colour. There is nothing eccentric or bohemian about my personality, so I adapt colour to my own sensibility by wearing it in streamlined tailoring. Unfussy silhouettes ‘fit’ my subdued personality even when worn in primary colours or citrus shades. But what if you’re someone who isn’t drawn to colour? What if you prefer neutrals and classic pieces like trench coats and white shirts? Should you jump ship and try treading new sartorial waters? Will you be at risk of becoming the proverbial invisible older woman? Not at all. You can find a bolder, braver version of yourself by exploring more fashion-forward versions of these classic pieces instead.

Think about a trench coat made from a fabric other than cotton twill, or even better, from a mixture of materials for a more directional look. Leather lapels, suede detailing, tartan trims give a standard trench more personality and as a result your look will have a more considered edge. A white shirt, meanwhile, can look as directional as any pair of Iris Apfel jacquard trousers when it’s designed with an oversized collar and cuffs, or an asymmetric cut, or in an exquisite broderie anglaise fabric. But if this, too, sounds like too much pressure for you; if you prefer that your clothes don’t stand out, then that’s okay and Apfel has two brilliant pieces of advice. Firstly, “[When] your hair is done properly and you are wearing good shoes, you can get away with anything.” Secondly, “Personal style is attitude, attitude, attitude.”

You don’t have to wear an Iris Apfel creation to embody her message of empowerment. Whatever it is you put on on any given morning, own it.

Midlife style is about just that. Owning whatever makes you feel like your best self. Of course sometimes life throws curveballs our way and we have to improvise, as has been the case for actress Jada Pinkett Smith. I wanted to mention the actress because I saw a shot of her on the red carpet before I knew anything of her alopecia. My instinctive reaction was that her shaved head was an unapologetic style statement that married beautifully with her directional Jean Paul Gaultier dress. The mother of two has always had a courageous style personality and last Saturday night was no different. She owned the entire look, from buzz cut to peep-toe shoes. She looked sexy and powerful and completely comfortable in her own skin.

Jada Pinkett Smith wearing Jean Paul Gaultier/Mike Coppola Getty Images

Her husband’s reaction to Chris Rock’s joke was a shame, because to me it undermined Pinkett Smith. She was rocking her look and was the envy of me and I’m sure many other women who would love to have the features and/or the nerve to pull off a shaved head. On that red carpet, she demonstrated that those old-fashioned sartorial tropes – a bare decolletage, luscious locks, a red lip – are not what elevate a woman’s red carpet style from pedestrian to captivating. It’s the woman herself. In midlife and beyond more than ever, there’s no roadmap to great style. To quote Apfel again, “It’s about self-expression and, above all, attitude.” Pinkett Smith had both in spades, as do you and I. Remember that.

Marie Kelly, April 2022